Happy Wednesday! As per newsletter tradition, let’s begin with a frankly gorgeous JPEG:
the little frog getting a bootyhole massage
I can feel that little frog fighting for his life. Imagine someone grabbing your leg, all the way up to your bum, and pulling it away from you? As you grip for dear life? Trembling with the fear of being yanked and yeeted back out into the abyss of a pitch black pond?
He’s doing a good job.
I want to start by sending my heartfelt thanks to all the employees who read and responded to last week’s email. It was read over 25,000 times! What a wonderful result. I have been walking around this week feeling so light and happy… kind of like a miracle. Like I’ve been delivered, preferably by a Hillsong pastor, to a better place where I’m less focused on myself and my perceived shortcomings. Feels brilliant to be looking outwards. :-)
Tonight’s TOP HAT TIPS are an extension of that unbridled joy – as they come from human happiness conduit, comedian and podcaster Alexei Toliopoulos!
I first met Alexei late last year. I was doing a writer traineeship on a show called Question Everything (which is a little like Gruen Transfer, only news-based) and Alexei was one of the panellists. There he is, on the left!
And even though I’d heard his name before – it rolls off the tongue, alexei toliopoulos – I didn’t know much about him. I’m glad I didn’t because it gave me the opportunity to RELISH a 10/10 first impression!
Alexei’s aura is kind and wacky. I imagine him being the kid in primary school who exuded Eugene-energy but in a way that everyone loved. He could get away with anything. His quirks? Universally adored.
Watching him on set, it was clear this mans is a star. People gravitated towards him, his jokes were wholesome and intelligent and he didn’t rely on foul language in order to be funny – a skill this CEO is unable and unwilling to master.
FROOMESWORLD has a long track record of predicting the next big thing (look no further than cummies) and I would put real money on Alexei becoming a household name this side of 2023.
I am honoured to have him present his TOP HAT TIPS.
WHO F: Who are you?
AT: Greetings to all who are reading this! I am Alexei Toliopoulos. I’m a comedian, podcaster, writer, Greek, dvd collector, celebrator of cinema, son, pop culture detective and a proudly lifelong pedestrian (afraid of driving).
A post shared by Alexei Toliopoulos 🧿 (@thisisalexei)
WORK F: What do you do for money?
AT: Let the record show that I stared blankly for several minutes as I pondered my existence in relation to my bank account. But I guess these days, I make podcasts for money. I’ve hosted the movie podcast Total Reboot for years and have made podcasts for Netflix Australia. My favourite job is making the audio-docu-comedy-mystery-investigation-podcast Finding Drago / Finding Desperado with my best friend Cameron James. We find weird mysteries in popular culture that nobody is investigating and we start tugging at the threads until it all unravels. It’s what I hope I get to do for the rest of my life in some form or another! But I also feel constantly underemployed.
A post shared by Alexei Toliopoulos 🧿 (@thisisalexei)
FILMS F: I haven’t known you for very long (a month at best!) so I only know through others that you are truly obsessed with films. Can you explain your journey with films? When did the obsession start?
AT: (And what a gorgeous month it has been!) Yes it is true, I am a registered cinephile (I have to go door to door explaining to my neighbours that I love movies). Dedicated my life, health, hopes and dreams to the mistress of the silver screen. I think I became a complete obsessive when I was around 13/14. I’d always loved films but this is when it really started to evolve into curiosity and wanting to deeply explore. I started working at a really cool video store when I was a teenager (Mondo Movies in Annandale, Sydney) that specialised in arthouse, cult and classic films. Probably my most formative experience in my life. It just gave me access to so much stuff that I would have otherwise never have found. I’d more than likely still work there if it still existed (RIP). From there, I was inspired to go to film school and started reviewing films for ABC on tv. I don’t think I’ve ever loved anything as much as I love film and it has always been based in the want to explore, discover and share.
A post shared by Alexei Toliopoulos 🧿 (@thisisalexei)
AUSTIN POWERS F: On the above, your favourite film is Austin Powers. It’s my favourite movie too! Ever!! I love it so much because of the costumes, music, Mike Myers and pop culture references. It’s my favourite kind of comedy – wacky but somehow not lame. A real art! What about it is so great, to you?
AT: I simply adore the works of Mike Myers. I love how he has this balance of winking at the camera campy goofiness while still retaining heart grounding his best works in a really unique way. The VHS I had of Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery was the first film I ever saw at home that had those top and bottom widescreen black bars letterboxing the film, so it always felt intensely cinematic to me. Cam James and I used to do a podcast called MIKE CHECK where we checked in on all the films of Mike Myers to see if they were still shagadelic so we really became the world leading Shrexperts in the field of Mike Myers. What I think sets Austin P apart from most greats of comedy is that it never sacrifices its style to the point the style informs a lot of the comedy. They don’t really make mainstream popular comedies that visually beautiful anymore.
KISS ONE, MARRY ONE, KILL ONE F: Heather Graham, Liz Hurley, Beyonce.
AT: TOUGH ONE, BRO! BUT I have an answer. I think Liz Hurley is one of the most under-appreciated comedic talents of all time. She completely grounds the film and offers the audience the way in on this bizarre bespectacled man from the past. SO YES I WOULD MARRY HER. I’d shag Heather Graham because she is Austin’s equal. And tragically that gives me no other option but to anger the Beyhive.
SHREK F: Shrek is getting a serious workout on the internet lately. I swear it reached fever pitch when Lil Nas X started posting sexual videos of himself alongside the terse ogre. Are you a fan of Shrek? Is the hype warranted, or has it lost all meaning via memeing?
AT: I actually despise Shrek. The film and the character. My least favourite Mike Myers character. In Shrek Forever After, Shrek has another midlife crisis, openly resents his kids and breaks his wife's heart. I hate that depressed green fuck. I think Shrek 2 is the only good movie in the quadrilogy (maybe because I love Puss in Boots). I feel like the modern memeification of Shrek is around people that loved Shrek growing up coming to terms and dealing with it actually being bad and mean.
GREECE F: I watched you on Question Everything, and you told the story of how during an earthquake in Greece you stuck your finger out of your balcony and the kid next door bit it. Am I remembering that correctly? Did you grow up in Greece, or was that a holiday?
AT: This is correct! I thought we had caused the earthquake. This was like a 6 month stay in Greece when I was 4 while my parents worked there. I was meant to go back last year and rediscover my roots but… y’know… So hopefully next year I can reconnect with my Hellenic heritage.
HOMESTYLE F: Is your family big into cooking? It’s your birthday and a relative is cooking your favourite meal – what is it?
AT: My mother is a great cook! My Yiayia not so much. But so many of my happiest memories are around the table sharing food with my loved ones. My birthday cake is always Galaktoboureko, a baked filo pastry and custard pie with syrup.
CHEF F: Who is your favourite chef and why?
AT: AnthonyBourdain was such a huge inspiration for me. I first read his memoir Kitchen Confidential when I was in high school. I re-read it this year and it still had a huge impact on me. His cookbook, Appetites, is such a winner. Adapting some of his favourite foods from travelling to the home kitchen (specifically apartment living).
FW interjection: the first Bourdain article I ever read was ‘Don’t Eat Before Reading This’ – a missive in a ‘99 edition of The New Yorker. His writing was so cutting, visceral and savage without ever disrespecting food and the people who make it. 💔
BREAKFAST F: What do you typically eat for breakfast? I believe this is an important insight into a person’s psyche… for example I eat Weetbix, banana and milk every morning.
AT: Beautiful question and a stunning daily breakfast. What I always come back to is toasted bread, tomatoes, bocconcini and topped with either homemade pesto or za'atar with olive oil.
DREAM F: Can you ever see yourself blending comedy and cooking? When I make my variety show I would love to have you on as the free-wheeling chef in an infomercial-style segment.
AT: This would be a magical dream. I’m sure this would be powerfully dangerous, but I have always been willing to sacrifice myself for comedy.
COMEDIAN F: Who is the most inspiring comedian to you?
AT: Conan O’Brien. First time I saw him I knew I wanted to work in comedy. I’ll never forget his parting words when he left The Tonight Show in 2010… “please do not be cynical… It doesn’t lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.” - Always stuck with me as a mantra to be kind, positive and optimistic.
RECIPE F: This is so exciting!!! I love all the pictures of food you put on your instagram. Can you please give me the recipe and method for this scrumptious Greek Lobster Pasta? I hear lobster and immediately think, too expensive!! Am I wrong?
A post shared by Alexei Toliopoulos 🧿 (@thisisalexei)
AT: I love this pasta. This is a dreamy summer seafood dish that is as delicious as it is impressive and most surprisingly… it’s actually a pretty fricking easy one pot procedure. People are going to blessing your hands like you’re a regular George Calombaris (without any of the career defining wage theft).
Using just the lobster tails saves you a little money and sometimes they’re even on sale at Woolies (I found some fresh frozen for $7.50 at the Woolworths fish counter that I used in the very picture attached to this).
Αστακομακαρονάδα
Greek Style Lobster Pasta
INGREDIENTS x4 lobster tails (can use frozen, just thaw them before) 1 clove of garlic 1 onion 1 teaspoon chili flakes 1 teaspoon granulated sugar 1 tablespoon fresh thyme 50 ml brandy (or cognac or rum or whisky are fine if you have that) 750 ml stock, chicken 1 can chopped tomatoes 70 ml olive oil approx (Greek Olive Oil is the best… lovely and green) 250 g spaghetti or bucatini (I actually love bucatini for this… usually I think it is one of the shittest shapes of pasta but here I think that little straw like hole down the middle helps with the slurp and the bite)
FOR SERVING Fresh Basil Pepper 1 tablespoon olive oil
PROCEDURE
Put your large pot on a high heat. We need it to get pretty hot!
Roughly chop your onion and thinly slice your garlic.
With a good splash of olive oil, add your chopped onion and garlic to the pot with chilli flakes and sugar.
Saute all this stuff until nicely caramelized.
Turn it down to medium heat (we don’t want those onions to burn) and add that fresh thyme.
With a knife split your lobster tails in half vertically (so you’ve got two identical pieces)
Turn the heat up a bit and place the lobsters in the pot flesh side down first.
Cook on both sides for about a minute or two.
Drop in that brandy (or whatever you’ve got) and cook out the alcohol.
Pour in the stock, lower the heat, pop the lid on and simmer it all for about 8 minutes
Pull out the lobster tails and set them aside.
Add a glug of olive oil, the tin tomatoes (and add the Thyme if you forgot to put it in earlier like I did, or if you’ve got anymore drop it in) and mix it all up.
Put the pasta in the pot (yes! It just cooks in the beautiful sauce you’ve been making.)
This is why I love Bucatini for this because it soaks up all that lobstery brothy goodness). Crack some pepper in there too and stir occasionally for about 10 minutes.
While that pasta is cooking, remove the lobster flesh from the shell and place it back into the shell loosely.
Serve up the pasta and sauce with the lobster placed on top.
Drizzle the servings with a little olive oil, pepper, leaves of fresh basil (and it is not illegal to add parmesan or pecorino but it probably doesn’t need it! But this is your dish now so use your agency on this final step)
Now you may eat. And if you have made this for family or friends, please bring me up during conversation and plug my movie podcast Total Reboot.
Gorgeous, Alexei. Thanks for your generous contribution to the company.
And thanks for reading, my feline friends. And my bovine enemies.
Please reach out if there’s someone’s THT you’d love to hear. I’m ambitious and will happily deploy the powers of the blue tick for the right guest.
Oooooh that recipe , oooooh that man .Delightful ❤️