Good evening my fellow froomites.
I trust you are well. I am medium to good. Currently, I am eating a Lindt Nuxor chocolate.
TBH I’m a bit strop on Lindt. During the Great Redundancy of 2020, they offered to send me a box. They fully said yeah it’s coming and it never came.
It was triggering for me, because in 2002, a new girl came to my school and my mum made me invite her to ice skating. She came, and midway through a lap she goes, “I have a Baby Born for you in the car.”
Naturally, I was beside my fucking self. I loved Baby Borns, and the thought of a fresh one truly tingled thine asshoél.
Nek minit ice skating was over, and we were walking to her car, and she goes, “oh I forgot to pack it.”
I never heard from her, or that Baby Born, ever again.
Unlike that fabled Baby Born, tonight’s newsletter very much does exist. And while it may not piss on demand, it’s special because it contains the TOP HAT TIPS of FW’s Chief Creative Commander, Madison Griffiths.
Madison Griffiths is a multidisciplinary artist. She is a writer (with bylines in The Guardian, SBS, Vice), a poet, a tattoo artist and a scabber of cigarettes.
We became friends in Year 8 because she had a cool MySpace.
Best layout, wrote entirely in lowercase, big Two Weeks - Grizzly Bear vibes. And as someone with the barebones layout and Bonkers - Dizzy Rascal, I was bewitched.
Online, our styles remain worlds apart (she presents as a Queer Brunswick Vegan, I a Mostly-Asexual Southside Alien) but our values, and the respect we have for each other, runs deeper than any of her reasonably priced tattoos.
She is my best friend, and much like a fart, her contribution to the success of FW is hard to quantify. That’s why I’m proud to publish her TOP HAT TIPS.
PODCAST
F: So you just released Tender. Benjamin Law described it like so on Twitter:
MG: Yes, Tender! A couple of years ago, I wrote and produced a podcast about what happens once a woman leaves an abusive relationship. In 2019 it was picked up by the podcast network Broadwave, and in pairing with Broadwave co-founder Beth Atkinson-Quinton, the two of us co-produced the second season of Tender, which follows domestic violence awareness advocate and survivor Roia Atmar’s life after abuse. It was released yesterday!
STEREOTYPES
F: Stereotypes exist for a reason, and you are a vegan. The fact you live in Brunswick is endlessly funny to me because you’re literally Brunswick Starter Pack. As a Southside Princess, anything north of the Yarra is alien territory. Where can I find a feed in the 3056?
MG: I’m what my community affectionately refers to as a potato vegan… which is a kind way of saying a vegan that doesn’t give a shit about their health. I eat salads, chips, and the occasional hash brown. But the last thing I ate was actually a really delightful bowl of noodles from Vegie Bar.
INSTAGRAM
F: Take a screenshot of your ‘explore’ page.
EAT
F: You grew up in Cranbourne. Apart from Cranbourne McDonald’s, where is good to get a feed?
MG: Well, Cranbourne is one of the few places in Victoria I believe that has a drive thru Subway. We also go to the Cranbourne RSL on Monday nights for two-for-one meal deals. I even use my grandma’s senior’s card if I’m feeling particularly cheeky.
PLAYLIST
F: If anyone reading this was to take one thing from this email, I hope it would be to follow you on Spotify. Every day I see what you’re listening to and just copy it. I don’t know where you finds these songs but 8 times out of 10, I listen once and instantly like it. That never happens, and it’s a good reprieve from listening to Wild Life - Client Liaison every day on repeat, as I have for the past two years. Can you share a playlist you like right now? Maybe one to write to.
MG: My absolute pleasure!
This one is called ‘Writing, Lyricless.’ Which means I have absolutely written, fucked, cried, masturbated, drawn and cooked to it. Take with that information what you will.
BEST SRI LANKAN FOOD IN MELBOURNE
F: With an Australian dad and a Sri Lankan mum, you’ve no doubt had as many hoppas as you have RSL garden salads. Where to cop?
MG: Without a second thought, I’d definitely hit up Upali’s in Glen Waverley. The hoppers there are popping. My dear friend, who also happens to be a friend of FROOMESWORLD and a third cousin (it’s the way of our people), works there alongside her immediate family and I have had the absolute pleasure of dining at both the Glen Waverley Upali’s and the Upali’s in the heart of Colombo.
But, if you’re determined to stay north, I’d check out Citrus for a Sri Lankan feed. In saying that, they very rarely have hoppers…
FUNERAL SONG
F: What’s yours?
MG: Don’t Kill My Vibe by Sigrid. Ironic, sexy and yet still… sad.
TATTOOS
F: You stick and poked an alien into my buttcrack last Christmas. Is that your fave tattoo you’ve ever done? And if an employee wants one, where can we find you?
MG: Look, the knowledge that you spread your arse cheeks apart for the sake of my art stirs something up in me. There’s no denying that I hope to live vicariously through the tiny, tattooed alien that peers up at whoever has the pleasure of peering down at you, my good bitch. It’s my favourite, sure. Stylistically, metaphorically, and spiritually. Find me on IG @madisonrgriffiths.
FINALLY
F: Any final words? Do you want to ask me a question? I haven’t talked about myself in a while. I’m happy to give you some business advice should you so require.
MG: Fuck one, marry one, kill one: fuck, marry, kill. Go.
F: Ok. I’m killing marry (I’d rather spend the money on a house). I’m fucking kill (feels naughty). And I’m eloping with fuck.
Another THT! He he.
I hope you enjoyed that one. Let me know what you think! I froth on email replies. They are like little mini Lindt Nuxor choccies in my box. Creamy and good for me.
My love forever,
F x