Good evening festive townsfolk!
Frogs have the same consistency as a mildly moisturised nut sack.
I wish I could end the newsletter there, on a high, but instead I’m coming to you with a most Froomy Gift Guide for the Holiday Season.
Whatever you celebrate, there are a million excuses to excavate your savings like you would your bowels after a double serving of leftover ham with cranberry sauce in a crusty tiger roll.
But if you’re anything like me, the minute an occasion is upon me (such as the birthday of Jesus, or my Mum) I can’t think of a single good gift to buy. The brain goes completely blank but for a few flickering fairy lights in my peripheral vision telling me to buy a Glasshouse candle.
That’s why I have thought long and hard about things I would really like that I also think maybe other people would like too. I have curated this list based on things that’ve been in my basketussy for months or things I’ve been gifted that I’ve truly adored.
I also asked for your gift ideas, particularly ones with an environmentally-friendly bent. I am recently interested in sustainability. It could be a phase – à la chihuahua – but either way, it’s worth capitalising on by sharing some eco presents.
Here are a few gifts. The pleasure is mine!
LANEIGE / Lip Sleeping Mask in 'Gummy Bear'
Starting off with the most immaculate stocking filler or mid-tier friend gift. This is an entry-level present that your kris kringle partner will be obsessed with. I’ve been around the wringer with lip masks and balms and they always leave my charlie chaplips dry and hurty. But ever since I got this little pot of perfection (back in May) my lips have never looked or smelt better.
The texture of this product is perfect. It never goes tacky, or gunky. It also really does work and makes my lips kind of go a sexy colour which is offset by the fact I wear a yellow retainer to bed. I would usually shy away from candy-scented products after brushing my teeth but this transcends any post-Colgate issues.
They recently did a gifting to influencers and unfortunately I didn’t make the cut which makes this suggestion all the more bittersweet. But I can’t let my pride get in the way of recommending such a great product.
purchase for $31 here.
FAT TUESDAYS / Multi-Use Chopping Board
I’m squealing with excitement to share this present but I must warn you – you will be hard-pressed to get your hands on one of them.
Why? Because these are 100% recycled, hand-made, food-safe, small-batch chopping boards manufactured in Sydney.
A few months ago in a period of intense energy, I orchestrated a meeting with a sustainable design consultancy company called People & Things because I wanted to make artisanal poo stools made out of recycled plastic (fully serious). I didn’t go through with it because I don’t currently have it in me to girlboss that close to the sun, but when I was there I saw these Fat Tuesdays boards being made and the process was laborious. The flecks you see in the boards are from the different types of plastics they use.
I just bought one for me Moom and she loves it.
purchase for $110 here.
SOUND MERCH / Ur Fave Band, Merch
How about some merchandise from your favourite band?
Sound Merch has some of the most sickest and slayest bands on their merch roster. We’re talking Tame Impala. We’re talking Mallrat (who perpetually has the coolest merch). We’re talking Amyl & The Sniffers, the greatest performers now and potentially forevermore.
They also Bjenny Montero pieces – framed artworks, t-shirts, hoodies and records. I really need this one particularly.
A gift voucher for someone to drop on their fave band is a jolly good gift IMHO.
P.S. I’m still rocking my Tame Impala bag from the Rushium concert most days. How fucking good was the concert? The wave bit is still playing rent-free in my mind and making me feel happy, emotional. Loves it.
MEJURI / Flat Curb Chain Necklace
Nek up it’s a beautiful gold necklace from Mejuri!
Mejuri is a Toronto-based business that caters to the ‘Millenial’ market with semi-fine jewellery at ‘reasonable’ prices (I inverted comma’d both those phrases as both are subjective, particularly the millennial bit, millennial is a state of being rather than an age bracket, I’m Gen Z presenting with Boomer rising).
Their 14-karat solid-gold chain is truly perfect. It’s hard to find a gold chain that is the right length and colour and strength while still sitting flat on your chest. I wear it to the beach, to bed and beyond. It’s $850, but I’ve worn mine every day since June and I have no plans of taking it off, so the cost per wear is working.
80% of their gold is recycled and they have a page dedicated to explaining the sustainability of their process that (full disclosure) I’ve not bothered looking through lol. But it’s looking good bruv.
Is this your first Christmas and/or Holiday Season with a significant other? Convince them to buy it as their ass will no doubt get tighter as the years go by!
purchase for $850 here.
(If you’re looking for a more budget-friendly jewellery option that is cute and cool, I would also recco Arms of Eve – I wear these gold-plated earrings near constantly. They’ve got a lil store in Bondi if you want to check things out in true life.)
PLEASANT STATE / A Clean Slate Kit
So, about two years ago I did an equal parts niche/vague Instagram story about growing up in the south eastern suburbs. I made up two characters (based on real-life childhood friends) who used to think I was dumb, but then I beat them in chess and they cried.
Imagine my fucking surprise and delight when a woman named Sian popped into my DMs and asked me if I grew up in Mount Waverley – then guessed who the semi-fictional characters were based on! You know when you’re talking to someone and want to scream because it’s so funny… I can’t share the messages cos they’re mildly c*nty on my end but omg:
Anyway! It gets better!
A few weeks ago when I pivoted to eco-warrior, Sian messaged me to say she’d started a business – Pleasant State – that creates sustainable cleaning products!
The bottles are glass with colourful silicone grips. The product itself? Little waste-free and non-toxic dissolvable bars you put into the bottles. No need for single-use plastic. You add water, they fizz up, and voila, you are ready to get up and clean ur mf house!
(The cut-off date for ordering your supplies is Dec 11 for all states bar WA and NT, sorry Papa McGowanussy.)
purchase a full kit for $129 here.
DUCK RAGU / Custom Glass Mirrors
Remember when I did the newsletter tour of my tamarama wonderland dream house?
The inhabitants, Charlie and Jordana, had a custom piece by Duck Ragu. It was a hand-made stained glass homage to their favourite artists, Joan Miró and Alexander Calder:
i want one of homer and marge </3
Thankfully, the little flea who runs the mainframe of my brain reminded me of her work mere weeks before Christmas! I’ve asked for a gift voucher towards my very own custom piece from Duck Ragussy.
they cost between $410 - $510 (I believe) – send her a DM to clarify here!
ARTS PROJECT AUSTRALIA / A Work Of Art
Arts Project Aus is a creative social enterprise that supports artists with intellectual disabilities, promotes their work and advocates for their inclusion in contemporary art practice.
And their pieces are fkn sick!!!!!
You can peruse the website or, if you find yourself in Collingwood, you can check our their exhibitions in a gallery above Hope St Radio. May I suggest going there for a natural wine and a bite of their Good Food Guide-hatted focaccia after?
I think a gift voucher is a perfect pressie.
get one from $50 to $1,000 here.
MECCA / Holidaze Eyeshadow Pallet
Never in my life did I think blue eyeshadow would be a thing. I remember thinking it was super tragic up until 18 months ago.
And its resurgence is a lesson in being humble and flexible. It reminds me of how, when I was eleven, I thought fake tan was absolutely vile and also that I would never kiss my future partner in front of my parents, not even when getting married.
Now I am an eyeshadow devotee, and would maybe now peck someone while tying the knot. My favourite eyeshadows are the Mecca Max branded ones. I use last year’s iteration at least weekly. And this year’s ‘Holidaze’ pallet has me gagged. I saw Rowi Singh use it, so I need to use it.
purchase for $40 here.
Thank you for reading my babes! It’s been the hottest minute since I’ve spoofed one of these out but I will endeavour to write a few more before the year’s out – next up will be a Sydney and Melbourne hit list for the bi-state-curious.
Have a lovely week,
This was the best gift guide ever, amazing. Thank you!
Love ya Froomey! The only person I want to buy these things for is ME 🤠😈